


Stay

by Xerethra



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Gen, M/M, Marauders, Mental Health Issues, The Golden Trio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-10-05 01:26:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10294271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xerethra/pseuds/Xerethra
Summary: Sirius is bored and tired of living in his childhood home and has trouble coping with all his experiences.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted to a Tumblr blog years ago but have just started getting on here so, here it is here, as well.

Sirius was lonely. He hadn’t much to do nowadays, his mind growing tired too quickly to find much enjoyment in the crosswords puzzles Lupin offered to him each morning after he was done reading the paper. On those days when Lupin was around to hand him the paper at all, that was. Moony was the lucky one, being able to escape the weariness of the house, to go out and fight and be of proper use. Lupin used it to his advantage, staying away for what seemed liked ages letting Sirius to shuffle along in a house that hadn’t never been his home but was filled with memories of the past yet the same. The children had been darlings to have around, momentarily setting Sirius psyche to his old way of behaving. Laughing had felt a bit unusual after all those years not wanting to laugh again, but he had enjoyed it as far as his mind let him to. Fred and George quite the pranksters like their uncles had been but yet not reaching the level of genius of the Marauders. Hermione a bright mind that sparkled his own thinking, teasing the corners of his brain as once Lupin had done when he was young and fresh and not tired from fighting. Sirius had been allowed precious few moments of spending time with Harry, trying to pass down the wisdom of his and Harry’s father, wisdom often interrupted by Molly and her worrying, and it all hadn’t been quite as Sirius would wish it had been but still it had been a great summer. One of his best, that he could remember. He had even been graced with the change of living by his wisdom, sneaking with Harry to the platform as Padfoot - “what’s life without a little risk”, and all.

But that was then, when it was summer and lively. The children had the blessed opportunity to travel back to Hogwarts for yet another school year and quite alone Sirius couldn’t live like he preached. It was too difficult remembering how to be rebellious and bold when the memories didn’t quite match and refused to tell him how it was done, when the house whispered of disappointment and gave him guilt, Regulus’ non-existent ghost frightening Sirius, mind getting more tired and ashamed than angry by Mother’s words when he was alone to hear them.

“Stay”, Sirius had urged one late afternoon when Snape dropped by. What his errant was Sirius didn’t know and didn’t care for, possibly delivering Lupin’s potions so they were readily available when he got back or something else completely. It didn’t matter. What mattered was that Snape was present and Sirius was alone and in that moment Snape seemed like an angel sent, a beautiful black angel that with his big nose and persona carried with him memories that Sirius wanted, needed, pleaded for. “It’s not like you have anything better to do, have you, Snivellus”, Sirius added to mask over the begging that had painted his voice, raising an teasing eyebrow and the nickname that so many years ago had been given to the man he now begged to stay tasted like honey on his tongue.

 

“Snivellus”, Sirius said once more, because he could, because it tasted good, because it made him feel young and alive again, the hints of a grin tickling the corner of Sirius’ mouth.

 

Snape stayed and Sirius congratulated himself for still appearing intimidating by Snape, pleased that Snape’s old memories of Sirius wits and quick wand-hand still affected him all these years later, ignoring that it was probably rather the expensive cognac that Sirius bribed him with and the change of being away from stupid, loud children a little longer that tempted Snape to linger for a while.  
Sirius pushed his guest down in one of the stuffed arm chairs by the sparkling fire in the drawing-room, a hand that hugged the skinny arm underneath the dark sleeve of a robe as if Sirius was fascinated by the physicality of Snape, bewildered that he could once more touch another human being, and when Sirius remembered that it was a human the touch stung and he drew his hand back, a happening that went by too quickly for Snape to have time to shape a scowl for him. Sirius sat down in the chair opposite Snape’s, instantly shuffling the furniture nearer, to the fire perhaps had been the original thought but he planted himself nearer to Snape instead.

 

Sirius poured them the promised cognac, reached out a trembling hand holding Snape’s glass to him in a jest of a caring host, drawing his hand back to help its twin cup his own glass once Snape had taken hold of the fat cup.

 

“I don’t think I have introduced you to my friend, have I?” Sirius inquired after a time of near silence, Sirius’ glass had shattered against his teeth when he moved do drink his spirits, the fire sparkling homely, the low thuds of Kreacher moving about.

“Buckbeak he’s called. A magnificent beast. Has sharp claws and a strong beak, so you better be careful”, Sirius laughed, low and rusty with a tired streak to the bark instead of the carefree spirit of old, as if the memory hinted at that involved werewolves and near death was a joyful remembrance of young life and immortality. “He’s quite lovely”, Sirius continued, not registering if Snape gave any kind of answer. “Has let me ride him and all. It’s not the same as me old bike, it isn’t, but he’s great company, yeah.” Sirius nodded fiercely, both as to remind him of how lovely Buckbeak actually was and in a way to persuade Snape of the greatness of the hippogriff, fingers that longed to fiddle about with a bike once more gripped the cup of his glass harder.

 

“I think he won’t like you too much though, Snivellus, so you better be sharp should you meet him. He would have liked James, he would, very much, and him and Moony well, Moony has never been very good with animals, has he?” Sirius mused over the rim of his glass, tipping the glass to wet his lips cognac. “But you stink too much, I’d think, for Buckbeak’s taste. Has a delicate nose, he has and is very smart, he is. Knows not to trust Snivelluses. I stunk quite much in the beginning of our friendship as well, but, I guess I do smell nicer than you anyway, y’know”, Sirius raised his eyebrows in a flutter of arrogance of the youth that didn’t fit too well with his face marked by the years spent behind bars.

 

“But I have prepared you good for meeting dangerous animals, have I not?” Sirius wondered while drawing up his legs beneath him, a sort of curling up himself as if he was in dog form. leaning against the arm rest that was propped up the closest to Snape. Sirius stayed in silence after the question had been spoken, as if the warmth from both the fire and the body near him made him dozy, comforted a mind that never knew how to sleep properly.

 

It was with a light startle Sirius came around again, the mind that had lost track of time unable to tell if some mere minutes or long hours had passed since he had stopped speaking. Snape had placed his empty cup on the round side-table and it had been when Snape took Sirius’ glass as to prevent it from crashing down to the floor Sirius had blinked and come to life again. Snape stood up, rearranged his robes in preparation to leave.

 

“Come back soon”, Sirius said while standing up himself, padding after his lifelong enemy as he moved to use the fireplace in the dining room instead of the one they had sat by. “Maybe you could bring along one of those potions set I could play with”, Sirius suggested to the black back in front of him. “Or some crosswords. I liked those.”

 

Snape reached for the Floo-powder on the mantelpiece and Sirius stepped forward to the wide open chest before him, looping his arms around Snape’s thin frame, an embrace that remembered of the young, strong, spirited hugs of Sirius as given in the past. Sirius let go of Snape’s unresponding body in a heartbeat, stepping back with a thin line of a blush over stubby cheeks. He let one of his arms stay raised so he could wave Snape good-bye.

 

“Later then, Snivellus. I hope one of your students charms his essay so to explode in your face while you correct it - maybe you’ll lose a bit of that too big of a nose, eh. Bye!”

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Characters and world belong to J.K. Rowling, not me. I do not make any money out of this.


End file.
